Bullshxt.

Soo i've really been fkn up latly and im sure everyone 'close' to me can see that. I'm sitting here on lonely friday and my compue is the only thing lighting up my room. I've just been doing bullshxt for most of these couple of months and I'm sooo confused on life. It's like. How do people expect me to be real when they get hurt in the process, which is my biggest strength and my biggest weakness. The phobia of hurting other people, but its stupid. because in the process i end up hurting people subcounciously or however you spell it. But yeahh. alot of the peopl who are getting the best of me sometimes shouldnt deserve it and some of the people that get the worst should get more of the best...so i'm gonna pay some homage in this blog. If you get mad at the pros and cons i throw out. So be it:





Malik, Malik, Malik. Besides Britt, you get some of the worst verbal treatment that I can process through my mind. Lol. But for some weird reason, i like you. I see too much of myself in you for me to leave you alone. You're like my lil bro. Id just rather call you other shxt instead of that. Youre almost as smart as Gordon & I although. youre like a walking symbol of bad luck. Youre always fkn up. lol. But youre so opimistic that you can put a smile on your face and keep going head first. I admire that. It's something that you should never change about yourself. Ily dude. Brotherhoods dnt need a no homo.






Lol, youre soooo pissed at me right now. Lol. But I still love you even though you hate me right now. YOU my good friend really deserve the best of me the way you always stick your neck out there for me and other people. You are one on of the few people I can really lean on, although id rather bad mouth and ignore you. Which half of the time is out of love. I mean I always take you for granted, you call everyday no matter if I called back or not. You tell me goodnite& i love you no matter what,you tell me good morning and have a good day before i even wake up sometimes. Youre like the only personthat does that ithut aking fr anything i return! Youd rather give than get. And thats what god wants on this world. Youre just not good at picking friends. lol. like me. And I really am sorry for what I did and like I said, I understand if you dnt wanna talk or have anything to do with me anymore. But dont keep your guard up because youll end up missing that one friend thatll treat you the way you want to. Youre going to be famous and youre probably going to own the True Life company and a sushi restaurant when you grow up. And youll own your own magazine. I cant wait to pick one up at Wal-Mart. lmfao. But yeah. Youre great, Brittni. A great person && friend. I guess you dnt know what you got until lose it. S-M-H.






Anoher person that I 'slick' take advanage of. My rival. Brother. Annd Best Friend. We go neck-to-neck in everything. Our existence is either for teamwork or competition. But we've been through thick && thin ever since we met. We've been stuck together. We even almost look alike. lol. But youre in the hospital right now, and it took Malik to put me on 3-way for me to actually speak to you after your/our mom asked me several times to call you. Thats pretty fkd up with me saying your my bro.I just hope you're alright dude. I reall cant lose you...dead ass. Ily man.





Ehhhh look whos here. Endia Desiree Hubbard. That ONE chick i couldnt get rid of if I want to. I appluad you Babe. Your the only female with enough patience to put up with me for almost 11 months and counting without cutting me off for a period of time. You more or less take me for granted but im not her to talk about that. You put up with alot of my mood swings, and who knows how many times ive made you cry. But people only see the outside. Which is "Endia is always bitching you out Ant" "Aww youre Endia's little puppy", ect, ect. Which is Bullshxt. So I don't stunt it. Although you do get attitudes and I feel like saying a couple things to your face, which yes, I am crazy enough to do and have done before. But you get most of the best of me and ask so much of me. Youre so spoiled. But im not complaining. I just wish youd kinda drop the attitude a bit moe than a little bit. Then maybe I can do what I need to do. Lol. But I love you with every fiber of my being, and im not scared to say it. Im sprung. :o I said it. You happy? Thats all gotta say, l0V3MUFFIN ily.


I feel kinda better about myself I guess. Idk if Ill solve my phobia though. You have to hurt people whether you like it or not and I haven't accepted it yet. Sooo i'll keep you posted on that.in the meantime peaceee.